Jessica's Pregnancy Journal, Entry 2: 7 Weeks

Dear Diary,

I am not a nice person lately. In general I have been so cranky lately. I remember this from the last pregnancy, which is at least some comfort. It’s weird to feel like its normal to be crazy. The actual culprit is being tired, that’s where it ALL stems from. I need to try harder to get extra sleep. Although sometimes I’m tired no matter how much sleep I get. Is the word for that “fatigue”?

In general, everything is annoying. The husband gets the lion’s share of it, poor thing. My brain really truly thinks that my life is harder and should be acknowledged much more than everyone else’s. I wonder if that’s a pregnancy instinctual survival thing? That to protect the baby (by protecting herself) the pregnant woman puts herself above all else.

It is annoying that the husband does not also see me and my new pregnancy as the most important thing in the entire world, God’s gift even. I cannot believe I just wrote that. But it’s true!!! It’s not a nice feeling because I know that it means I do not care that much about others and that is not like me. I have to try hard to remember that the husband is supporting our family and doing such a great job!

On the upside, I have little or no morning sickness at all! I am very lucky. And the husband is also really wonderful; I’m just having a hard time seeing it lately. I see it later. At least an hour later I realize that he’s trying really hard. Poor guy. We have a joke that we pray for the second trimester to begin quickly. Except in church on Sundays I think we both silently pray for that. It’s funny because we’ve been through it with the first pregnancy so we can joke about it as if looking from the outside. That’s a blessing! 

We are very lucky and enjoy talking about having another little one. Boy or girl, brother or sister for our Baby James, it will be neat to see two of them together. One has been SUCH a joy, an indescribable happy newness every day. A feeling that grows with each day. I should go make the husband some cookies or something. He deserves that. And what pregnant lady DOESN’T like cookies?!

To read more from Jessica's journey, visit Jessica's Pregnancy Journal.

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